Night Before Christmas...

We're anxious today...the day has gone by so incredibly slow. We slept in, went to church, had lunch, went to the grocery store, did some light shopping (for Dustin coin papers so he could count, collect and package his coins...yes we're looking for anything to pass the time), Dustin did some touch-up painting around the house and it is only 7:30! I have a feeling....time is going to creep for a while for us.
I feel like it is the night before Christmas or at least that is the closest comparison I can come up with.....essentially what hopefully happens tomorrow for us will forever change our lives. We're so incredibly happy about that....the thought of it all and the reality of "this may be the last night of us being childless," blows my mind! I will never forget the night before Jenn and Daniel went in to be induced to have Baby Aly...Dustin and I had a lengthy conversation on how weird that must feel for them...one day no child and the next forever they will be parents. It's a crazy thought to truly process.
I don't anticipate we will sleep at all tonight, but I did buy myself a new pillow for extra comfort over these next few days since I will be bound to bed. Overall, I am feeling better, but my stomach is still sore to the touch. Jeans & Seat belts = not on my favorite things list! It was nice to get out today, I had major cabin fever.
Our preparation for tomorrow begins at 6 am followed by a routine of drinking and retaining liquids which is then followed by a Valium....CHECK! I have been to the pharmacy so frequently over the last 6 months that when Dustin goes Mr. Patel (our pharmacist) asks him how I am doing and when I am seen pulling up to the window or walking up to the counter he automatically pulls my medications...haha! He told me the valium will likely make go in and out of sleep which is A-OK with me.
Well the time has come....wish us luck and lots of prayers! Two weeks from Monday we will know if it took or not. Following the procedure I have bed rest for 2 days and will then be down to 1 progesterone patch and 1 injection per day until we find out if we're pregnant or not. My box of meds has gotten substantially smaller!
P.S. We're only transferring two embryos -- not the full 13. What is left will then be frozen for future use if needed/wanted.

The egg retrieval went well yesterday. I slept most of the day following the procedure. I feel ok today and prefer laying around and don't feel quite like myself yet, but this is normal. They retrieved 15 eggs and the average is 8-10 so we were really excited! I just got the news this morning that 13 out of 15 of those eggs were fertilized! Which is another set of great news -- we could not be happier and more pleased with everything. I cannot compliment Fertility Center of San Antonio enough - the nurses and Dr.'s are all so very accommodating and have made this process so easy for us to understand and go through. They have treated us like they are just as invested in this process as we are. I have never been made to feel like they do this 10 times per day. The embryo transfer will take place on Monday at 11:30. We will know two weeks from Monday whether I am pregnant or not. As far as if they both took or just one -- we're not sure when we'll find that out, but "pregnant," will be good enough for us. For now -- I may need to call AT&T and get all of the movie channels added back to our package....this will likely be the longest 2 weeks of our lives. : )

Dustin Brooks, R.N.

Dustin has been a trooper! He has administered all of my injections and has taken to mixing drugs drawing back medications, changing needles etc. I feel like our bathroom has turned in to a nurses station and aseptic technique is a daily practice. Tonight at 10:30 I take my "most important," shot of this entire process to trigger my body to get ready for Friday's procedure. On one hand the Dr.'s work to stimulate my ovaries and produce a lot of big eggs and on the other hand they have to work to ensure my body doesn't naturally induce in to it's natural cycle and ovulate.
This morning's Dr.'s appointment went great. My estradiol levels were "perfect," and I have about 20-25 viable large eggs that will be retrieved on Friday. They measured from 15 mm - 20 mm which is again perfect. My retrieval is scheduled for 9:30 on Friday morning and the procedure should last 20-30 minutes. I get the full blown anesthesia so that in itself has helped me relax....the details of the procedure sound miserable. From there they will take the eggs and inject them with Dustin's sperm (hopefully his and not anyone else's haha kidding!) and by Saturday morning we will know how many embryos we have. On Friday they will tell me when my embryo transfer back to me will take place but it will likely take place on Monday. We are putting back in 2 embryos only....no octo-mom here! We will be freezing the rest so that I don't have to go through this part of the process if something doesn't work this time or we want to have another baby in the future. I am ready to quit being the Pillsbury Dough Boy (I AM FLUFFY AND PUFFY). 2 weeks after the transfer we will find out if it took or not. : )
We've had to be extra flexible in this process and I couldn't be happier that we waited to do this now instead of during the school year. I go daily for blood and every other day for blood, sonogram and consultation so they can be time consuming. Dustin's boss has been great and very understanding and has allowed Dustin the opportunity to work from home on Friday and Monday and any other days as needed....so that has alleviated that stress as well.
This weekend is Jessica & Nick's wedding (Dustin's cousins) in Valera and we're not going to be able to make it. We tried to work it out where Dustin could go but since we're now in the part of the process where his participation is vital we can't make it work. We're very very sad because we know what a great time it will be. : (
That's my update for Wednesday. Thank you all for your wonderful support, love and prayers. We're so thankful to have you all in our lives. : )

This Week...

We had another appointment this morning and everything still looks great. I have progressed a little slower than the "average" in-vitro-goer, but that's ok I'm happy I'm on summer and can take this time to relax. I go back on Wednesday for the final "go" date but as of today it is Friday. I found out for certain I am entirely out during the procedure-- will not remember a thing and I could not be happier about that. 3 days following the egg retrieval will be the embryo transfer so right now that looks like it will take place on Monday.
I'm at 3 injections per day in the stomach but those will soon be ending....thank the heavens.... Following all of these procedures we will then be injecting one time daily in the hip for 6-8 weeks--sounds like a lot, but somehow I have found some inner strength to suck this up. : )
We are getting so excited! I'm in quite a bit of pain today and the nurses just giggle at me -- as it will only get worse before it gets better. I have grown approximately 15 follicles and when they are around 17 mm we will go ahead with the retrieval. Today I measured 14 mm and a few 16 mm so we're close. Summed up I have a lot and they are getting big....causing me lots of bloating and pain in my abdomen and back. I don't sleep much for lack of comfort but my eye is on the prize. : )
I plan to catch up on The Real Housewives of every city, OWN Network, HGTV and Food Network. Aside from your prayers that this works I think you now may need to include Dustin in your prayers. This morning I woke him up at 4:30 to see if he wanted to go and get breakfast.....he was actually not mad....and we went out for some 5 am fresh Shipley's Donuts. I'm hungry all the time but can't eat all that much -- but makes for some fun AM fieldtrips.
Today I finished up work and closed out the year until August. I have decided I can be reached by phone and e-mail. Everything else can wait until August. Prioritizing -- myself and this process. Ok....now back to another episode of House Hunters.

Thankful - In-Vitro Updates

Well today was our first appointment following the beginning of the injections. According to all of the experts -- I am on track, extraordinarily healthy and reacting to everything perfectly. Everyone at my appointment today reemphasized to me how lucky we are....which puzzled me at first because after all I thought we were paying the big bucks to get pregnant, but the nurse quickly reminded me that not everyone can be helped -- no matter the technology or amount of stimulant drugs -- not everyone is capable of producing an egg or the right amount for that matter....so we're lucky...and sadly I had taken this process for granted, but know how all of the good things that are going for us in this process truly are gifts from God. Both Dustin and I have been a little restless thinking about what's to come in the weeks ahead -- so continue to pray that this process WORKS!
The injections are going well -- not exactly my favorite, but they are tolerable. I have 2 injections in my stomach daily through Saturday. I feel fine, look and feel super bloated, and a faint headache that I just can't get rid of, but really do feel better than that all sounds. Dustin has to give me the injections because I just can't bring myself to shove a needle in to my own stomach. He's been a trooper and often quotes how he used to do this sort of things to cows.......hmmmm not my favorite species to be compared to, but we'll go with it. On days of our Dr. appointment we have to take the injections later in the morning once we get blood results back etc. so Dustin has been trucking it to AHHS to give me the injections and then we both go back to work. We have another Dr. appointment on Thursday morning and on Saturday morning to continue to monitor and tweak my dosage as needed. Saturday we will then be told exactly the day of the egg retrieval surgery and 3 days following that will be the embryo transfer back in to me. I anticipate this all finishing up next Friday, June 10th, since things seem to be going very well, but we will not know for sure until Saturday morning. I am not nervous about the embryo transfer but am getting nervous about the egg retrieval surgery -- I only know it entails needles for follicle (that holds the egg) extraction and sedation and I think that's all I need to know.

Winding Down

Well the end is near....what a year it has been! Emotional roller coaster and well I guess we're still going round and round with the lack of a set budget in Austin. I am looking forward to summer; days to catch my breath and recharge. 8 more days for us! Yes....we have to go back after Memorial Day...booo! I have fully stepped in to my new position--fast-paced & the unexpected is always what will happen, are the two phrases I can use so far to describe my new job. The days fly by, which for me is a good thing because I get bored easily. I need a challenge to stay focused and engaged and being the department head for special education will ensure my needs are met!
The weather has been warm and sunny and has made nicely for some pool days for us. We've spent a lot of time lately grilling and swimming.....a great step-back from the fast-pace we endure daily at our jobs. Everything is going well with Dustin -- I think he is in need of a vacation, but given our fertility situation we're pretty much committed to staying in San Antonio through the summer..... but I can think of worse things.
We got our rent house rented. Our current tenant moves out the 31st and the new tenants (ironically from Lubbock) are moving in the 1st. Again, one more thing I'm disconnecting from for a more stress-free lifestyle for the upcoming months.
Tomorrow my fertility drugs will arrive to Dustin's office (slightly awkward for him I am sure!), but certainly more awkward for me if it is delivered to Alamo Heights High School and our next doctor's appointment is this Thursday at 7:30 am. From here we will get the injection schedule and the following 3 appointments in place. We're beyond excited! This is certainly helping with my depression that is expected to onset at the end of the Oprah Winfrey show on Wednesday. I remember watching her at my aunts house as a little girl following our daily soap opera runs....I am sure I begged Iris at the day care to let me watch Oprah instead of some nursey rhyme nonsense and I vividly remember watching Oprah with my mom on days she had off. Cindy Rose and I have been faithfuls since I was in elementary school. I am pretty sure I would finagle a way to get to Amber's house for the afternoon to only sit with Cindy in the kitchen, watch Oprah, and do our nails! I remember when they moved Oprah to the 3:00 hour when Dr. Phil got his own show....I'm pretty sure I was MIA at tennis practice around that time....after all I did live across the street from the courts so why not dismiss myself!!?? There is nothing quite as uplifting and feel good as the stories she has brought over the last quarter century. I've probably read the majority of her bookclub books, I have been a subscriber of her magazine for years, I subscribe to her e-mail blasts and I record and faithfully watch every show regardless if it is a rerun. Oprah.com is now even blocked at my school likely because I made the site have too many hits each day. ; ) I refuse to watch local news following her show because the message is never positive after such an upbeat hour. There will be a void without her show in my life -- she even makes me want to build schools in Africa! : ) I hope you are watching her 3 day farewell surprise series....I'm not sure who cried more times during the hour: Dustin or myself. She manages to find people that have been through it all and still have a "half-full," outlook -- it often puts me in my place and helps me focus on the good in my life instead of the speed bumps I've had.
Below are some more photos of Blackberry Farm -- my favorite property and hotel to stay at -- E V E R ! Heaven on Earth.....if the world was truly coming to an end and we had warning...I would migrate here. : )

P.S. Happy 31st Wedding Anniversary to my parents--what an example you have been!

Blackberry Farm Photos

Summed up: amazing, breathtaking, the most beautiful venue Dustin and I have ever experienced. Before I post a lengthy blog describing the French wine we had all weekend or the farm to table food we had, enjoy these photos of this 4,000 + acre farm in Walland, Tennessee just outside of Knoxville. www.blackberryfarm.com